Hye morning my dear blog....cikyaa tengah siapkan proposal tpi tibe2 cikyaa headache and nak menaip cnie...sorry la xberape nak tengok sgt blog...nnti cikyaa cuti seminggu tau...lagi la cikyaa lupe blog kejap...kihkihkihkih~
cikyaa malas nak bebel sal proposal tu...ni cikyaa nak citer sal anak kawan ibu cikyaa aka mr.F ni...
haritu die cntct cikyaa selang hari la jugak...sekarang kan..hari2 die contact which cikyaa dont even know die nak ape dan xnak tnye...sebb lau tnye mcm dh thu ape akan berlaku...so mencegah lebih baek dari mengubati..hakhakhak...
So die tegur la kat whatsapp...wadap wadap yaw..tpi die xdela tnye wadap cmtu...die mesti kaver sopan kan...cikyaa xtersentuh pun ngn sopan die tu...jahat cikyaa kan..tapi tu la..pengalaman mengajar...cikyaa macam xde nak hadap die sgt pun...kalau die anta balas la...lau die x anta cikyaa diam la..memang perangai cikyaa cmni pun..cikyaa prefer org tgur dlu...
Tapi kdg2 rase kejam...mungkin sebab die je selalu tegur cikyaa...tibe2 haritu die kate..
"Kalau rase nak tegur n anta chat..anta jela..boring2 ke anta je chat...lau free org balas la"
Secara pendeknye die nak sruh cikyaa mulekan la conversation sekali sekala...kan? Xyah jawab takpe sebb mmg cmtu niat die...mungkin die rse xsedap die je kene tgur...but i just can say sorry...i cant make it...i prefer to only replying ur message rather than greeting u first...
Honestly i am awkward with the situation...after 5 years we were making our own path..how can u expect me to suddenly be as friendly as u want it to be...
And the most important thing...i dont even feel insecure with anything...u cheated on me several years ago and how can i give back my trust on u?
Yea..maybe u think we can make it easy because u are the first guy in my life and i am the girl in ur life...but the fact u ever changed...and it might happen again rite?
how can i create a relationship when i feel insecure with u? Or is it because of ur mom? And u confident enough that u know me and my life..so u have no problem with that...maybe...but not for me..in fact although u have not started anything now...i have started to test u..because my opinion now is u cant stay longer being single...and let see how it goes..because if u have changed...u will fight for it...this is thr phase we are seeking for destiny not a temporary relationship...
But i am grateful that he has not touch anything on feeling so far...which i dont hope for it to happen within this short time...because if u dare to touch on relationship or feeling issue...i bet u are ready to bear the shoots..cause this time i will not allow it to happen easily...
2 times having a failure in a long relationship with two different persons..first for almost 3 years with mr.F and almost 4 years with mr.A..plus incapability to have someone that i really into...makes me tired of these things..cause i just stand tougher than before...it is just the matter of losing trust on people...im sorry...
So mr.F...gud luck in ur way to create a gud relationship with me and if u are my destiny that has been destined...in sha Allah im yours...=)
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